Sometimes I think aging is hilarious.
Someone once said that “old” was whatever 20 years from now was. I have come to realize that most of us find it hard to believe that we’ll ever be “old.” I never understood women who hid their actual age. Now that I’m in my 40’s I still don’t hide it. I guess I’m still young by many peoples’ standards, and I have two young children that conceal my age in some ways. Most of my mom friends are in their 30’s–I had my babies at age 36. Truth be told, I’m proud of my age!
I haven’t come nearly as far as I wanted to by now. I feel like I’m about 10 years behind the game, but my faith in God informs me that indeed I’m on schedule, God’s schedule. So if I accept that, then I also have to accept the timing of things to come.
Including my wrinkles.
Fine lines were one thing but now that I’m approaching my mid-forties, some actual bonafide wrinkles are making themselves known. I don’t like it, but I accept them with humor. Aren’t they like badges, in a way? As in, “you’ve come a long way, baby?” We all know our culture vilifies aging, and I’d been guilty as anyone of thinking old people were totally “out of it.” Actually…aren’t they? But isn’t that beautiful? Many of them have learned to care about what matters most (and pop culture probably isn’t one of them).
With each new wrinkle (or sagging knee cap, ugh) I feel like I am one step closer to meeting Jesus. Sounds cheesy, but that’s me 😃.
I mean it though–my body is breaking down. I’m still relatively healthy, and God willing I will be for at least another 40 years. But these age marks and wrinkles indicate that things don’t last forever (Proverbs 31:30). I’m also finding it funny how the “young folks” have such a limited scope when it comes to appearances. When I was young I felt sorry for older people in some ways, but now I feel sorry for the young folks who lack perspective. And I know, of course, they’ll gain it soon enough. Beauty truly is fleeting!
Maybe it seems contrarian that I have done “beauty” pageants and here I am claiming that looks don’t matter. I would say that although I did the job I had to do to get into the best physical condition I could, false lashes and all, that doesn’t mean I hold that standard of appearance to be superior to others. As I said in a previous post, pageantry is a show, it’s a “sport” of its own; I did the “when in Rome” thing.
I have several vanity photos of myself from my pageant endeavors. I think those photos were part of my journey to realizing just how unimportant looks are. But who doesn’t like to try and see what they look like at their airbrushed best? I believe that selfies are an epidemic for that very reason. It seems people want to prove that they are somehow more “worthy” of admiration because they can keep up with the Kardashians (or whoever it is that’s beautiful in their views). I’ve wondered if every female in America would get some high quality vanity photos done, would they gain perspective that almost anyone can be made to look like a celebrity and get past this whole Selfie thing? I wonder.
Try finding the humor in the situation, if you will, when it comes to the changes your body makes after a certain age. You are still you, and if you believe in eternal life, the body you’re going to have for eternity is worth this 40-50 year downward spiral on earth after a certain age. I can’t say I’m thrilled about aging or “losing my looks.” But I can say I do find it rather funny.